Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Why do good girls like bad boys?
Michele at a small victory posted this followup to a previous discussion about what is sexually attractive. My first reaction to the pictures she posted (of men she considered sexy, hot, whatever) was that all of these men looked like they had just gotten out on parole. And the very least, they appeared to be from "the wrong side of the tracks". I started to shrug it off, but for some reason it was really bugging me.
Then it hit me: Michele had opened an old wound that can never really heal. She reminded me of some of my worst memories of high school. She reminded me of the main reason I will never truly understand women.
Back then, we geeks at my high school had a saying, "Trans Ams or Yamahas". It was our way of articulating why we were always spurned by the opposite sex: the best girls always went for hunky jocks or neer-do-well delinquent-wannabees on motorcycles. I still remember all those high school dances: half the pretty girls dancing with their jock boyfriends and the other half out back smoking pot with their freak boyfriends. (In my day they were called freaks. They've also been known as greasers, hippies, drug-dealers - but through the generations they've still been basically the same people). And along one wall you had us geeky boys, the other wall was lined with fat girls from the band. Neither side would cross over to ask the other to dance, that would be like admitting defeat.
The jock-attraction I can lve with; it makes perfect sense both in an evolutionary and societal context. This always works out in the end, because the jocks always end up working for us geeks later in life. But the freaks, that was another story. I just didn't, and still don't, get it. When you think about it, this attitude is EVERYWHERE in the female side of society. In bodice-ripper novels, the love interest is ALWAYS the rouge-stranger. In chick-flicks, the girls ALWAYS leaves the clean-cut rich guy for the guy from the wrong side of the tracks.
I've had my own theories aboutht this phenomena through the years. For the longest time, I figured it was a way of Repudiating The Father. After all, Daddy wanted her to marry the blonde lawyer. And she has Daddy issues. Hence, she ends up with Christian Slater. But now I'm not so sure. My wife is no help, she goes for the clean-cut type.
So what is it ladies? Is it the sense of danger? Adventure? Do you just like to get slapped around? I'm seriously asking you to help heal this wound. Why do good girls like bad boys?
Then it hit me: Michele had opened an old wound that can never really heal. She reminded me of some of my worst memories of high school. She reminded me of the main reason I will never truly understand women.
Back then, we geeks at my high school had a saying, "Trans Ams or Yamahas". It was our way of articulating why we were always spurned by the opposite sex: the best girls always went for hunky jocks or neer-do-well delinquent-wannabees on motorcycles. I still remember all those high school dances: half the pretty girls dancing with their jock boyfriends and the other half out back smoking pot with their freak boyfriends. (In my day they were called freaks. They've also been known as greasers, hippies, drug-dealers - but through the generations they've still been basically the same people). And along one wall you had us geeky boys, the other wall was lined with fat girls from the band. Neither side would cross over to ask the other to dance, that would be like admitting defeat.
The jock-attraction I can lve with; it makes perfect sense both in an evolutionary and societal context. This always works out in the end, because the jocks always end up working for us geeks later in life. But the freaks, that was another story. I just didn't, and still don't, get it. When you think about it, this attitude is EVERYWHERE in the female side of society. In bodice-ripper novels, the love interest is ALWAYS the rouge-stranger. In chick-flicks, the girls ALWAYS leaves the clean-cut rich guy for the guy from the wrong side of the tracks.
I've had my own theories aboutht this phenomena through the years. For the longest time, I figured it was a way of Repudiating The Father. After all, Daddy wanted her to marry the blonde lawyer. And she has Daddy issues. Hence, she ends up with Christian Slater. But now I'm not so sure. My wife is no help, she goes for the clean-cut type.
So what is it ladies? Is it the sense of danger? Adventure? Do you just like to get slapped around? I'm seriously asking you to help heal this wound. Why do good girls like bad boys?
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